Friday, August 14, 2009

The Final Session: In Which We Decide Future Events


So, as everyone knows by now, this campaign is hereby ended, due to lack of time and DM burnout. However, we did continue the storyline in our last session (7/30) and came up with a projected future series of events. Herein lie the accounts of the various invasions of the new Hora Quan Empire.

Also, guys, as I plan to write up Janan's crazy crossdressing lesbian romance at some point, I'd really appreciate it if y'all could forward me any extra campaign/world info you have. Metagaming for the win!

What Was Happening Behind the Secretive, Secretive Scenes:

The Diamond Throne was approaching Freja, offering to set her up as Empress of the Hora Quan in return for her basically being their puppet.
Anika was off being Robin Hood? or is this a future event?
Janan was actually a girl!
Blank was planning a possible coup, if necessary. (Read: if Leif takes over.)
Sigrid was getting really sick of all this political bullshit and she and Ganan were thinking of just leaving for another plane.
Leif was conniving with Kheriim and by extension Kaperi.
Halden was actually a drunken idiot!
Er...Ghalib still didn't care about anything but the library and his family.
Cho Dan (?sp) made overtures towards Leif, who was considering forming an alliance with them.
The Harrid are thinking of invading Xanadu. More magic to eat!
Stavros is ready to be allies with anyone who will help against the Harrid. Various people try to take advantage of this.

What Would Have Happened:

Sigrid and Ganan leave. (Yes, I know she was planning on sinking the island, but let's just forget about that for the sake of the plot, alright?)
The Giants invade! with Freya as a sock-puppet sort of ruler.
Leif ousts the Giants with the aid of Cho Dan.
The Harrid invade EVERYWHERE.
(cue battle with clockwork army!)
Anika forments a rebellion in Diamond throne territory.
Blank is the mastermind behind the rebellion in Xanadu, supposedly led by Halden.
Mihal catches up with Janan. They help with the rebellions, traveling around and having their EPIC CRAZY ROMANCE. (ahem.)
Eventually, the forces of Good (or at least the protagonists) prevail! Halden and Anika jointly rule over the Diamond Throne & Xanadu. [PLOT HOLE OF GINORMOUS PROPORTIONS BEING THE HEART OF THE SEA GODDAMN IT I NEED MORE INFO FROM ODDYSEY GRAR] Blank is Commandant! And not only owns the whole ocean, but EVERYTHING.
It works out well for everyone who doesn't die a terrible awful death at some point.

RL Quotage from Friday, July 30th:

"Giant squid are well known for their arrogance." - Oddysey

"Sean Connery is pretty delicious." - Qwerty

"You hate the Grand Canyon? What did the geographical feature do to arouse your ire?" - Oddysey, to Artemis

"At least I win a moral victory." *pause* "By which I mean an imaginary one." - Oddysey

Monday, July 20, 2009

The Bearverine is finished!

The Clockwork Bearverine is finished. While there were some delays in the development cycle, and a suboptimal initial field test, it is finally done. All that's left is to go to Sigrid and Gannon and receive the funding for the mass production versions. While they have rejected all previous designs, I see now that that was because they were inadequate and woefully amateurish. -- Soern, confident and excited.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Session 7: In Which Halden Spends Quality Time With His Grandfather, And We Learn Our Lesson About Dark Magic Tunnels of Doom

  • We sleep on the beach (with watches! to keep away dark forces of deathly doom!) to regain spells, etc.
  • Third Watch: Aed & Janan hear a bizarre shriek. Aed wakes Stavros and Janan sneaks off to investigate.
  • We hear the shriek again. (ohnoes!)
  • Janan approaches the ocean and finally recognizes the sound, remembering that it is mating season for the eels of Gorzam.
  • The following morning, Aed teleports us back to Xanadu.
  • While arguing what to do about ded!Halden, we are noticed by guards, who, naturally, notify Sigrid of the crazy people carrying the prince's corpse!
  • She is Not Pleased.
  • Soern cannot revive Halden until the following day, for unspecified spell slot related reasons.
  • Halden LIVVEEESS! But is not stumbling around in search of brains, only in search of beer.
  • We then go to Gorzam in search of Blank (teleportation instead of tunnels being seen as the better part of magical travel).
  • Uncle Grisby's Tavern!
  • Uncle Grisby has no knowledge of Blank's current whereabouts.
  • We know that Blank and Sebastian set out for Gorzam at the same time but on different ships. Blank & co. never arrived, but Sebastian did.
  • We find this suspicious, and go talk to Sebastian.
  • Apparently, according to Sebastian, Blank got distracted by something and said that he needed to go do something else.
  • After some somewhat confusing discussion, we go off to the Pirate's Cove (with passwords provided by Sebastian) to rescue Antonio, one of Blank's Admirals and Sebastian's younger brother, from the bad!pirates (i.e., the probable rum smugglers who are not honest enough dishonest men to put their dishonest drinks on the honest black market!
  • Janan, forgetting about the passwords, attempts to charm his way in.
  • This fails.
  • In a way that should classify it as a total!fail (TM).
  • Kheriim attacks one of the two guards, then Stavros attacks the other one, engaging us all in battle. One guard manages to call for assistance, so then we had to fight those too.
  • We defeat them: yay us!, and decide to let them live if they promise to become honest fishmongers. (Why yes, Kheriim was the one to check their motives. However did you guess?)
  • We then go to get Antonio from his cell with their admittedly coerced assistance.
  • After locating Antonio, we also locate R(?what's his name?) the leader of these dread rum smugglers. Kheriim sends an elemental into his room to wake him up (really, with the way she summons these fire elemenatals, you'd think she and Janan would be better friends...) and after he is chased out of his bedroom by fire! we interrogate him.
  • While talking, R says it doesn't matter if we kill him because "Don Maurice" will resurrect him.
  • He refuses to answer any further questions so we decide to forcibly take him back to Xanadu.
Most Skaraavan women are actually "men," where "man" means someone who has been horribly subjugated for at least a year and then escaped on his own and killed at least three dread magic-eating birds with his bare hands.

"There is sprite at the end of the tunnel!"-Foole, to Artemis re: her thirst on the way to D&D

"THOSE are the shrieking toads. They always croak louder when they're about to feed..."-qwerty, re: cryptic comments between maggie and oddysey regarding what turns out to be the shrieking eels of gorzam

"You can't argue statistics with an angry mother."-foole & qwerty to oddysey re: her rational arguments against Sigrid's rage at Leif and everyone else

"I can be a pirate!" -Artemis, Kheriim

"You know, bondage is a good look on you."-me, Janan, to a shackled Antonio

"Oh!I know that game!"-Artemis, Kheriim, re: mind stab
"That's not a game."-foole, Aed
"It's an excellent game! Verrik children play it all the time!"-Artemis, Kheriim
"..This explains so much."-me, Janan

Soundtrack Continued

Session 4 Tracks:

9. Hans Zimmer - Two Hornpipes (Tortuga) (Gorzam)

Session 5 Tracks:

10. Nine Inch Nails - Vessel (Janan + Halden + Sex)

11. Haley Bennett - Entering Bootytown (Khorl)

12. J.S. Bach - Toccata And Fugue in D minor (Temple of Evil)

13. Nobuo Uematsu - Darkness of Eternity (Fight song for the skeletons)

Session 6 Tracks:

14. Ricky Martin - Cup Of Life (Cup of Life/Death/Prophecy)

15. Warren Zevon - Mr. Bad Example (LEIF KILLS HALDEN)

Session 7 Tracks:

16. Klaus Badelt - To The Pirates Cave! (To the Pirate Cove)

Friday, July 17, 2009

Alastor's Domain

Many years ago, a human named Halas Torstead was made a god. The circumstances of the how and why have long been lost to history. He is now the god Alastor. As such, he has a piece of a plane that is all his own, his Domain, just as all Gods have.

Alastor's domain appears to be the combination of a Victorian garden and a hedge maze. It is a series of rose gardens connected by hallway-like corridors made of plants. Navigating these corridors is nearly impossible without Alastor's help. Each rose garden is a different color, and causes those within the garden to experience different emotions.

His favorite section of his gardens is his observation room. There is a large pool of shiny silver liquid that can view different areas in the mortal realm. Alastor spends much of his time watching here various mortal pursuits such as wars and bizarre sporting events.

Alastor's Domain is the source of the Festoons de Fervor, which are bouquets made from flowers from several of Alastor's gardens. The roses can be used to influence the feelings and emotions of those around the bearer of the bouquet. Alastor is very careful about distributing these bouquets, as they are quite powerful. He does tend to give out single roses to visitors, friends, and persons of interest to him. These roses are eternally in bloom and have very limited emotional power on their own.

Session 6: That's Animist, That Is! Rocks Are People Too!

  • Session starts with us outside the temple of Doom.
  • Aed teleports us to Xanadu's docks. (Huzzah, we don't die of teleport failure!)
  • Janan and Kheriim argue about stones' sentience.
  • Elsewhere in the temple district, a Clockwork Bearverine gets loose and causes mayhem. Soern claims no knowledge of said beast.
  • We find Sigrid fighting and destroying the clockwork bearverine.
  • Sigrid is debriefed on the cup-getting venture.
  • Sigrid holds a conference with Soern, Ghalib, Aed, and Stavros about the cup. Janan and Halden hit the bars. Leif and Kheriim do their things. (?)
    The cup is only mentioned one other time in Ghalib's studies, and that in conjunction with the stone tablet we'd already found.
    The tablet had been a gift to the empire. Pre-Harrid but still subjugated Skaraavan wanted a place to hide it and keep it safe.
  • Soern fills the cup with gold, as referenced in one of the scraps of info Ghalib previously found, and asks its powers, limitations, and capabilities.
  • The cryptic answer: "Life. Death. Prophecy."
  • There is then an argument over who should bleed in the cup, to test that aspect. Ghalib is irritated by powerful adults acting sillier than his youngest daughters, and cuts his hand to provide the blood. Sigrid slices her arm open to see if drinking the silvery elixir will cure her. (It does.) Sigrid then bleeds a pint of blood into the cup, and uses the elixir to heal Gannen of a terrible magical injury (previously unknown of to most present). Gannen is all better! And the Heart of the Sea is no longer acting weird. Oddly, Gannen and Sigrid disappear for the next couple of hours.
  • The next part of the session was spent arguing about what quest the 11th levels would take up next. Possible choices included searching for Blank (lost somewhere in Gorzam), searching for possible Harrid scouts in Xanadu, going to deal with the Harrid problem in Skaraavan, returning to explore more of the tomb of Ozymandias, researching the shadowy bird who talked to Leif, ...
  • Aed, Kheriim, and Leif talk to Soern about the magical shadowy bird. From what Soern says about the power involved, etc., we are Holy Hells! Monala must be behind this! And promptly freak out.
  • We then decide to search for Blank in Gorzam, but by way of the tomb of Ozymandias ( a sort of compromise).
  • Going through the tunnels, we make it to the ice cave without problems, only some strange noises off in the distance.
  • Then we are attacked! And we do furious battle with shadowy crystaline porqupine-like humanoids.
  • Leif nearly dies. A LOT.
  • Leif ends up hitting Janan and Aed with a buffed up explosive crossbow bolt and nearly kills them both. Janan and Aed are Not Happy.
  • We are finally victorious, but Halden is DED. So we decide to go back to Xanadu quick as can be to get him resurrected.

Alession: God of Clockwork Beasts
Eliran: God of Sudden Death
Alanis: God of Not Actual Irony

Firing a ranged weapon through an ally's square is akin to attacking said ally. BAD LEIF.

We must now lobby for a cliched anime featuring time katanas. Because Time Katanas are More Awesome than you.

"ADVENTURER'S GUIDE FOR THE DUNGEON GUY!" -foole, re: craft (interior design)

"Katanas can freeze time!"-me
"No, no, they cut THROUGH time!"-foole
(re: discussion of why katanas are not as useful as western longswords and why anime style cleavage does not actually occur)

...distracted by time katanas. time passed. whoops.

"You appear on the docks. People give you some strange looks, but not too many, because people popping out of thin air is not the strangest thing to happen in Xanadu on a regular basis."-oddysey

"This is more of that verrik elitism, isn't it!"-me, Janan, re: kherriim's lack of respect for stones and/or earth elementals

"One of Soern's creatures got loose! Half moose, half platypus-"-Oddysey
"all deadly!"-me
(re: a clockwork bearverine getting loose in the temple district. Soern claims to have nothing to do with it.)

"Gannen! I have silvery elixir of awesome for you! Yes, it used to be my blood, but it's fine now!"-Artemis, Sigrid

Session 5: In Which Noone Remembers to Take Notes

  • The party sets off on their two month trip to Khorl, the closest port to the Deathwastes, in which there is apparently a temple containing the magic cup we're looking for(according to the stone tablet & Stavros).
  • While en route, Halden has his eighteenth birthday, and there is much rum rejoicing rum and rejoicing.
  • Janan convinces Halden to join him belowdecks. After they...entertained themselves and were on their way back up top, Janan notices the door to their room is magicked in some fashion. Halden does not care and goes on through. (sandwiches!) Nothing appears to happen to either Halden or Janan, so they decide to forget about it.
  • Once they arrive in Khorl, Janan decides to go visit her mam's old brothel. The magic-users decline to come, instead hanging out with Aed in some tavern/inn as he studies the distant mountain in preparation for teleportation.
  • The party landed in what turns out to be Zaz territory. Janan is noticed by a group of Zaz youngsters who attack as soon as they realize a Yarlz lad is in their midst. Stavros and Halden step in to help, and the battle ends with several dead thirteen-year-olds. (It's alright; they had it coming. They attacked us.)
  • The non-magic-users make their way to the brothel. Janan visits with old friends and ends up mysteriously disappearing for a while. Stavros is intrigued by the brothel and Halden disappears (most un-mysteriously) for a while.
  • Stavros and Halden meet back up with the magic-users, but there is still no Janan. Cue argument about looking for him, waiting for him, ditching him, etc.
  • Janan shows up all "Ready to go?" and many people want to slap him.
  • Aed teleports the group. We do not die! Or get split into many pieces across the lands! Huzzah!
  • We arrive at the Rakshasa citadel, AKA the Temple of Elemental Evil (consencrated to Fire, Death, and EVIL)
  • It appears most evil. We explore, but nothing exciting happens until we find an altar. Stavros' approach somehow triggers the opening of a secret door. Clearly, this means we must rush ahead into the dank dark tunnel of DOOM with nary a care.
  • We come into a great big chamber with a ginormous chasm and a stone bridge connecting our side to the other side with an altar and the Magic Cup of Quest-Fullfillment.
  • The magic-users are pragmatic and cautious, staying on the one side and making great plans. The non-magic-users are unsure what the words pragmatic and cautious mean, and blithely make their way across.
  • Halden decides in his infinite wisdom that as this is a temple of fire, blood, and evil, that it would totally be the best plan to bleed into the magical cup.  Luckily, this appears to do nothing besides create a silvery sort of substance.
  • Aed decides in his infinite wisdom to use magic! to lift the cup up and transport it to the other side.
  • We are then attacked by shadowy skeletons.  Many of them. Clearly the timing of this was completely coincidental.
  • Victory is ours, but we all suffer injury, particularly Stavros who finds himself rather near death.  However, when he touches the cup, it heals him.
  • We then chill outside the temple waiting for Aed to prep his teleport spell.

This party is rather polarized, but at least the two sides are even in number, even if the non-magic-users have to make do with an awesome npc rather than a third pc.

"It's like hobbits and birthdays, only with Russians and drinking!"-Qwerty, re: Halden's bday celebration

[re: discussion about Halden & his swift strike not being usable in sexual relations]
"It requires a weapon focus"-Artemis
"It has one. Longsword."-Artemis
"Not like that!" -Artemis

"But why is she cockblocking me?" -Boytoy, Halden, re: Kheriim's possessiveness

"The thing about humans you have to understand is that they do everything different.  The one thing that is the same is that they do everything different." -Qwerty, Stavros

"I'm drunk. I'm Italian.  It happens." -foole, re: suddenly emerging accent

"See, this is how you do this!   You warn them, they go ahead and do it, and then later you go, ha ha! See!  I told you so!" -Qwerty, Stavros, to Kheriim

"I do not see why I would not go with them.  Khorl seems to be nice place?"-Qwerty, Stavros

"He was lost but now is found! Is like blind and wrenches."-Qwerty, Stavros, re: reappearance of missing Janan

Friday, July 10, 2009

Encyclopedia Divinia

This is Aed's most prized possession. In his quest to catalog all the gods of the realms, he records herein information on any Gods, Goddesses, and other Dieties he discovers or hears about.



Goddess of Time

Symbol: Hourglass

Stern and humourless (boooring)


Deity of Truth, Beauty, And Love

Symbol: Hand holding a flower

Androgynous deity devoted to music and poetry

Johrd Ironthumb

God of Craftmanship, Building, And Engineering

Symbol: Obelisk

Labourers, craftsmen, and warriors


God of Conflict, Strife, and War/God of Fate and Chance

Symbol: Pair of dice

Most see him as a meddling trickster


Goddess of Nature And The Land/Goddess of Motherhood And Life

Symbol: Woman’s face made of leaves

Chief deity of the Denotholan pantheon


God of Science, Alchemy, And Magic

Symbol: Composite of magical and mathematical symbols

Maintains the laws governing the physical world


Erixalimar, Dragonliege

Dragon God

Once was normal dragon until he ascended

Rallonoch The Giving

Savior Deity

Symbol: Number 8

Monotheistic god, followers think others are demons (maybe all demons are really gods…)

The Dead Gods

Hanavere Trinity

Nalos, Tayana, and Seron

“Killed” by the dramojh

The Rune Messiah

Litorian runechild


Verrik God

Symbol: Eye within an eye

Banished by the Verrik



Goddess of Not Really Irony

Symbol: Bouquet of spoons(but no knife)


God of Passion/God of Annoying Sigrid

Symbol: Rose

Aka Halas Torstead

(Patron God for Halden)


God of Clockwork Beasts

Symbol: Turtle with a Gear for a shell (turtles are easier to draw than Bearverines)


God of Puppetry

Symbol: Face with googly eyes and a clown hat


Goddess of Finding Swords

Symbol: Sword inscribed with a question mark

Sister of Mixi and Wixi


Goddess of Sea Sickness

Symbol: Face with a hand over the mouth


God of Smiting Undead

Symbol: Cracked Skull


God of Suddenly Dying

Symbol: Tombstone being struck by lightning

(Patron God for Leif)


God of Defeating Monala

Discovered by Paerk and Soern during the founding of the New Hora Quan


Goddess of Random Songs

Symbol: Die with musical notes for pips

(Patron goddess for Kheriim even though she doesn't believe)


God of Finding Goblets

Symbol: Chalice with a question mark

Brother of Bixi and Wixi


Goddess of Starting Random Fights

Symbol: Two clashing fists

(Patron Goddess for Janan)


God of Not Listening to the Verrik

Symbol: Face with hands to sides of head


God of Finding Islands Full Of Bees

Symbol: A bee on a field of waves


God of Keeping The Heart Of The Sea From Blowing Up

Symbol: A heart cracked down the middle with hands holding it together


God of Arguing Over Marching Order

Symbol: Series of footprints moving around one another


God of Shiny Things

Symbol: Starburst


God of Judgement In The Afterlife

Symbol: Balance weighing skulls

Not to be confused with Whit


God of Finding Staffs/Staves

Symbol: A staff bent into a question mark at the top

Brother of Mixi and Bixi


Goddess of Descending Into Dark Dungeon Tunnnels

Symbol: Stairs in front of a dark tunnel opening

Not to be confused with Wit


God of Not Being Eaten By The Harrid

Symbol: A chained beak

(Patron God for Stavros)

Friday, June 26, 2009

Diplomatic Log 3

The relic hunting group has returned to Xanadu without that for which they searched. No information about the goblet could be obtained however they were told about a staff connected to the Hora Quan. We have been informed that the the staff of which they learned was created by a man familiar to us.
The group had then traveled to the Tomb of Ozymandias where a tunnel was discovered. While raiding the tomb, the princes apparently tried to kill each other. Due to her lack of previous interaction with humans, Kheriim's recollection of the incident may have be coloured. It is difficult to conceive that Leif would actually try to kill Halden, more likely it was a simple fraternal spat which she misunderstood. Regardless, the tension between the princes is an opportunity for us to further our agenda by playing them off one another.
The tunnel which they found led from the Tomb, to the island of Gorzam. This raises the possibility of other tunnels under the Spiral and alternate routes for clandestine activities.
Given these circumstances, information about the Drunken Gambler who passed through our lands must be obtained. Of particular interest is where he was headed when he left our lands and the location of anything he may have left or lost to our care. This information may be necessary to further our plans in the Empire.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Kheriim's Notes 2

Travel from Xanadu was on a boat. Likes Fire knows a lot about whales. He says they are magical. Skepticism will be maintained for the meantime. Time at sea was otherwise boring. Ao-Manasa has a lot of people in it. One is Finder of Things. Finder of Things knows nothing about the cup which we seek. Finder of Things knows of a staff that controls bees.

There are also bars in Ao-Manasa. Likes Fire and Trouble Boy wanted to go. Prince came too. Alcohol is bad, but drinks were had anyway. Trouble Boy tried to fight the bar. Then there was fire. It was time to go. Priest and Likes Fire argued. It was still time to go. Why won't they go? All problems can be solved with magic. They finally go.

Time to leave Ao-Manasa. Some want to find an island full of bees. Seems difficult. Some want to go to some tomb. Seems easier. To the tomb is the direction of travel. Also, human sexuality and relationships seem complicated. Likes Fire said something about Glowy Lady and sexual behavior and then Prince got upset and tried to attack him. Time to hide in the air.

When the tomb was in sight, something happened. White puddings attacked! It was bad and painful. Then there was magic and they died.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Session 4: In Which Our Intrepid Adventurers Find Themselves Inexplicably in Gorzam

Following the fight with the ice golem, we return to the boat for sleep, setting watches.
Last watch (Leif and Kheriim) was the only eventful watch, with some shadowy thing approaching Leif and offering to teach him how to control the Heart of the Sea in return for powerful artifacts.
Leif had not intended to tell the rest of the party, but the innocent insistence of Kheriim combined with a terrible bluff check means we are all now aware.
We return to the ice caves!
Past where the ice golem had stood guard, we discover much awesome treasure and a bizarre stone tablet. Stavros recognizes the script, but cannot translate. Ancient form of Skaravanian?
We spy an exit of some sort.
We exit!
Lo and behold, it is a cold frozen northland!
"This must be Gorzam," we say.
Ax confirms.
Blank calls Ax and is surprised to learn that we are in Gorzam.
Ax returns to the ship through the magical caves, dragging Halden with him, with the intent to sail to Gorzam and reunite with the party there.
We make our way into the city of Gorzam without! being attacked by wild yeti.
We go into the first bar Janan spots: The Yeti's Breath.
They have no rum.
This being Gorzam, they have no other alcohol either, just empty tankards and sighs and wails bemoaning the times when a fellow can't even get a flask of rum.
Kheriim 'makes friends' with a crazy guy who is apparently part of a PETA like movement and calls himself both a priest and a follower of the Great Icy JellyFish. (Guy has two eyepatches and wears a dead jellyfish for a hat.)
Stavros and Kheriim end up arguing about Verrik metaphysics.
Janan and Aed still want drinks, as does Stavros, so upon hearing a rumor of rum, we approach another bar: The Iceberg Lounge.
It's fancy.
And it has bouncers.
The bouncers do not like us.
We do not get any rum.
Luckily, we also do not get dead, despite Leif's almost starting a fight.
We then retire to yet another bar, one mentioned to Janan by Captain Blank: Uncle Grisby's Tavern.
We play cards and try not to kill eachother.
Captain Blank arrives in Gorzam!
Janan complains about Gorzam's brothels and their quality of service.
Blank refuses to let Janan sail his ship. Ever. End of story.
They finally decide to return to Xanadu with the information and treasure they've gathered, Blank communicating with Ax so that Ax will return Halden to Xanadu.
Our mission? To get the stone tablet translated!

  • Pio- God of Not Listening to the Verrik
  • Nysa- Goddess of Starting Random Fights


"You're like typewriter barbie!" -me to qwerty, re: his typing skillz

"Halden, you are siblings with Leif, no?" -Qwerty, Stavros
"No." -Oddysey, Halden

"There are nicer ways to send a message than by ominous shadow!" -Artemis, Kheriim
"But not cooler." -Oddysey, Halden

"-and then it was nice and jungle and everything was nice, but then the harrid come and they eat all the magic and it is becoming a desert." -Qwerty, Stavros, re: skaravaan history of being subjugated

"It's weirdly cold."-Oddysey, Admiral Ax
"Weirdly cold in the tomb of ozymandias?"-Qwerty, Captain Blank
"Weirdly cold in Gorzam. ...Actually, it's not weird that it's cold in Gorzam, but it is weird that we are cold in Gorzam."-Oddysey, Admiral Ax
"How did you get to Gorzam?"-Qwerty, Captain Blank
"We walked."-saganatsu, Leif
"...Damn magic."-Qwerty, Captain Blank

"All pirates are Italian!" -oddysey

"Crazy guy, can I wear your hat?" -Artemis, Kheriim
"No! You may not wear my hat; it is mine!" -oddysey, crazy priest who reveres icy jellyfish
and other natural fauna

"You could just eat the citrus fruits without rum, couldn't you?" -Artemis, Kheriim, re: scurvy in Gorzam
"You're just chock full o' blasphemy!" -oddysey, crazy guy

"When was the last time a god directly affected your life?" -Artemis, Kheriim
"The other day I prayed to the god of seasickness and then I felt better!" -Foole, Aed
"Personally, I've always found the gods rather useful. See, when people go to the temple, they tend to leave their bags unattended, and I've always found that to be helpful, especially when the bar's price for ale goes up." -me, Janan

"I could go for alcoholic beverage." -Qwerty, Stavros

"Gorzam is the town where people care if you murder the bouncers!" -oddysey

"Halden's talents are in hitting things and then moping about it! He gets it from his parents." -oddysey

"I would like to remind the party once again that my gender is male till specified otherwise." -me, out of character

"I have only the greatest admiration for the jaw strength of faen!" -me, Janan, re: argument about using the term 'biter' to refer to faen

Saturday, June 20, 2009

NPC Profiles

*Updated 6/20/09*

Sifqar - Male Verrik Champion of Magic
Sifqar originally from the Verrik desert (south of the jungle from which Kaperi and Kheriim hail). He came to Xanadu more than a decade ago while Sigrid and Gannen were after a Verrik named Qadara who had killed one of their Champions. Sifqar claimed that Qadara (who was his half-sister) was innocent and he was there to clear her name. As time went on, it became clear that Qadara had indeed gone rogue and Sifqar was forced to kill her. Sigrid saw this as an act of loyalty and invited him to stay. He's served the empire ever since. He's currently trying to find any trace of Paerk.

Jorik Malason - Male Human Champion of War
Joriik is native to Gorzam. He joined the Order of the Axe at a young age and served with Sigrid for about a year before she went off on her adventures on the Ocean's Blade. They also dated for a few months during that time but never really hit it off. He's been in charge of the Order (and the Empire's army) for the last five years, since the last General retired.

Halas Torstead - Minor Male God of Passion
Halas is Sigrid's father. He is also known as Alastor. He's never been much of a father figure. He occasionally appears in Sigrid's life when he thinks she's doing something interesting. He's the reason she's a runechild. She didn't inherit much from him except his extreme emotions. He showed up on Chak Itzin along with some other minor gods. Sigrid calls on him for information occasionally.

Cein Skystar - Male Faen High Priest of the Latter-day Church of the Hora Quan
Cein is a Greenbond who came to Xanadu after hearing about it from his friend, Paerk. He's a Greenbond and soon quickly became enthralled with the Heart of the Sea and its connection to the Green. With Sigrid and Gannen's blessing, he formed the Latter-day Church of the Hora Quan, which is mainly an earth-based, green-based spirituality, but does include numerous Gods (Cein is a Faen, after all).

T'nara'l - Female Dracha Champion of Freedom and Knight of the Axe
T'nara'l came to Pental from White Shoal Island shortly before the first Ao-Manasa coup and resulting war with the Giants. She fought valiantly and made a name for herself and has been one of Sigrid and Gannen's top generals ever since. When either Sigrid or Gannen goes off to battle (they don't ever go to war together for various reasons) T'nara'l is always right at their side. She takes their safety very seriously and considers every wound they recieve a mark of her failure. T'nara'l is also responsible for smoothing over Xanadu's relationship with Mixastomere.

Rasi Karradottir - Female Human Oathsworn
Rasi arrived at Xanadu four years ago at the age of fifteen. She demanded an audience with Gannen and told him that she had sworn an oath to protect his life. At first, neither Gannen nor Sigrid took the girl seriously. But Rasi was insistent and eventually, Sigrid and Gannen accepted her. Over the years, she has completed a number of tasks for them and her most recent oath was to discover the truename of the jealous God of Chak Itzin. Halden used to be quite infatuated with Rasi, but learned a few months ago that his crush was unrequited. He was quite upset about this and became even more angsty.

Zarstrak - Mojh Mind Witch
Zarstrak is the representative of the Mojh settlement on Pele Kor. The Mojh started showing up on the island a few years ago and have built a series of small villages. They practice magic and cultish rituals and generally keep to themselves. Recently they've attempted to tame the velociraptors with their strange magic. Their success rate is about 50% and is rising. The mojh decided they should send Zarstrak to Xanadu during the summit to make friends with the leaders. After all, they're here for completely legitimate, peaceful reasons. Honestly.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Session 3: Constant Vigilance! Velociraptors are sneaky creatures, don't you know?

We go into the tomb of Ozymandias.
Kheriim finds a secret tunnel.
This tunnel is cold, dark, and leading downwards.
It gets both colder and darker.
Suddenly, we are attacked! by a Grave Wolf.
This happens at approximately the same time we come upon an open chamber, size unknown but large enough that a globe light (radii of 20 feet) does not illuminate the sides.
Apparently, where there is one Grave Wolf, there are two more you missed on the spot check.
We do brave battle! And eventually prevail!
Although not without complications:
Leif hits Halden with an attack spell (as well as a wolf). Bad Leif!
Moving on, we come upon an ice golem guarding a giant door.
Janan attempts to be diplomatic.
This does not work.
We start fighting with it.
This does not work either.
Luckily, we all survive and manage to take the golem down, mostly due to Admiral Ax's higher level and Leif's early-spent rune attack.

Leif is a terrible brother. D:
Grave Wolves come from up north, where they are said to haunt the houses of the dead. When Grave Wolves die, they dissipate into a cold mist.
Arguing with a construct such as a golem is akin to arguing with a calculator, and as futile.
Janan crit fails way too often.
Halden & Leif are likely to kill each other in future sessions if there is not an intervention of some kind.

"That is vague enough for me to approve!" -Qwerty, Commandant Blank, re: Sigrid's definition of tariff

"He says he'll totally tone down the border actions if you tone down the piracy." -oddysey, re: npc Giant ambassador from the Diamond Throne

"If it makes you and your brother feel better, I totally have a lock of each of your hair, so I can always bring you back" -Artemis, Sigrid
"...thanks, mom."-Oddysey, Halden

"I will give monkey comrade little push up!" -Qwerty, Stavros, re: lifting Ax for gliding purposes

"Was that in my fake Australian accent? NO. Therefore, out of character"-me

"I'll take rear guard. Velociraptors come from the outside."-PitrsApprentice, Admiral Ax

"I do not understand the ways of northerners yet, but in my homeland, we would not call this very cohesive group."-Qwerty, Stavros

"What are you talking about? The jungle is full of dungeons!"-oddysey, re: some player comment
"Haven't you played Diablo II?"-qwerty

"You don't cast magic missile at the darkness!"-qwerty re: Leif's protestations of total innocence though he totally almost killed his brother

"Don't do that! Velociraptors attack from the outside! have you never heard of a ranged weapon?"-PitrsApprentice, Admiral Ax
"I've *heard* of them, but they're for posers."-Oddysey, Halden

"The more you are speaking the less I am being inclined to believe you"--Qwerty, Stavros, re: Janan's "explainations"

"I'm going to give Halden CPR." - maggienotmegan, Janan
"He doesn't need CPR!" - Artemis
"But he does need restraining." - Pitrsaprentice, Admiral Ax
"I can do that!" - maggienotmegan, Janan

"What I'm wondering is how I survived gang life in Khorl..."-maggienotmegan, re: Janan's fail!stats
"Apparently they're not very badass in Khorl."-Artemis

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Session Summary in Song & Quotes

Session Three Quotes:

Out of Character:

"Did you have no personality? Er, the other way around?" - Maggienotmegan, in reference to Spock in the pilot episode.

"We've got low levels to take care of the ship, and not get taken over by monkeys" - Artemis
"Um, I think we're past that point." - Qwerty
"What about being taken over by monkeys? Says the monkey?" - Pitrsaprentice

"Was that in my fake australian accent? No.... therefore it was out of character." - maggienotmegan
"Bear in mind that wolf three is immobilized" - Pitrsaprentice
"Bears? wolves? what!" - Qwerty
"What are bears?" - Pitrsaprentice
"Oh" - Pitrsaprentice(not entirely sure on the in-characterness of this one. Qwerty wasn't speaking in character, and I'm not sure how confused Pitrsaprentice was)
"That's #1 and #2?" - Oddysey
"No,that's #1 and Halden" - saganatsu
"Halden at half health" - Artemis
"Yay! And he's next to a wolf he can't see! And it's the wolves turn!" - Oddysey
"Oh good! He rolled max damage!" - Oddysey
"It... disappears in a puff of smoke." - Oddysey
"Ice smoke." - Qwerty
"No more wolf corpse?" - Maggienotmegan
"No." - Oddysey
"No wolf corpse to loot?" - saganatsu
"No." - Oddysey
"No caltrops? no wolf pelts?" - Artemis
"No." - Oddysey
"No random silverware or napkins?" - Qwerty

"I don't need to roll for that. It's there!" - Artemis (referencing Fire Elemental)

(looking at character sheet) "What I'm wondering is how I survived gang life in chorral." - maggienotmegan
"apparently they're not very badass in Chorral." - Artemis

"I gave halden use rope! he can do that!" - Artemis
"So halden is our dungeon bitch?" - Qwerty
"But I gave him 'getting into trouble' stuff." - Artemis
"Yeah, exactly!" - Oddysey
"Oh god." - Artemis

"If we get trapped we can just use the farspeaking amulets." - Qwerty
"You really want to call your mom to bail you out?" - Artemis (to saganatsu)
"Well Ax could just call Blank, his boss." - Qwerty
"Yeah, call blank and say "everybody's dead". And then not respond. Because I'm dead." - karen

"So when should we run away?" - Qwerty
"How about before we're blinded?" - Qwerty (shortly after being blinded)

"I'm going to give Halden CPR." - maggienotmegan
"He doesn't need CPR!" - Artemis
"But he does need restraining." - Pitrsaprentice
"I can do that." - maggienotmegan

In Character:

"Oh that's what a tarrif is? Oh! I got it confused with the one where you kncok them unconsious, tie them to their boat, chum the waters, and sink their ship! " - Qwerty, Commandant Blank

"I do not fully understand the ways of these northerners, but in my homeland, this would not be considered a very cohesive team" - Qwerty, Stavros

Session One Tracks:

1. Elgar - Pomp and Circumstance (Sigrids Summit)
2. Andrew W.K. - It's Time to Party (Blanks Party)
3. Beastie Boys - (You Gotta) Fight for Your Right (To Party) (Sigrid breaking up Blanks Party)
4. Kings of Leon - Sex on Fire (Janan + Fire + Sex)

Session Two Tracks:

5. Electric Six - Danger! High Voltage (Again, Janan + Fire + Sex)

Session Three Tracks:

6. Matt Uelman - Cave (From Diablo 2) (Tomb of Ozymandias)
7. The Prodigy - Run With The Wolves (Fighting Grave Wolves)
8. SSX - Slayboarder (Fighting Ice Golem)

I'll continue the tracks as the progress, and then present a final, edited version (as some tracks will be removed or condensed, possibly)

Friday, June 12, 2009

In which we set out for adventure and find pudding

Dearest mum,

I've been spending a lot of time lately taking readings for Master Soern. I think he may be regretting taking me as his apprentice and so now he just gives me busy work. He's always muttering about how I don't use enough attack spells. He just doesn't understand. I'm a priest, I help people, and usually that means healing or protecting them, not blowing them up. Anyway, the readings I've taken don't seem good. I think the Heart might be dying or maybe it's going to explode (Samani, God of Keeping The Heart Of The Sea From Blowing Up, forbid). Probably best if you cancel your plans to come visit, just to be safe. Besides, I won't be here! Lady Sigrid is sending me on a quest to find a mystical artifact that will fix everything!!! We're supposed to find a cup or goblet of some sort that's really powerful kind of like the Aur Xica, only not a sword so probably not very good for hitting people with. Pray to the God of Finding Goblets for me; the more prayers Mixi gets the more likely we are to be successful. The princes and some other strange people are coming to, so don't you worry about me. We'll keep each other safe, them with their swords, me with my spells.
One of the tall folks that is traveling with me is called Janan, and guess what?! He's Blank's son!!! He seems really fun. He's almost like one of us with the jokes he pulls. He told Kheriim (another human though she was raised by the verrik, weird) that whales are magic and grant wishes! He likes to get drunk and set things on fire, but it's okay cause Prince Leif keeps it from getting too far out of hand. Speaking of Leif and Janan, I saved the Prince's life today! Janan said something not too nice about Lady Sigrid, and so Leif and Janan got in a fight. Then Janan put a knife to the prince's throat! I made him drop it though.
I don't think I like water-ships. I spent the whole first day bent over the rail making offerings to the Goddess of Sea Sickness. Chulda must have been appeased though because I was fine the next day.
Our first stop was Ao-Manasa. We went to see Taevin and ask if he knew anything about the Goblet. He didn't, but he did know something about a magic Staff (or is it Stave) that was connected to the Heart, so make sure to add a prayer to Mixi's brother Wixi so we can find this Staff. I figure if we want to find the staff we should look for an island full of bees (prayers to Rinaloo would help), but instead we decided to go to the Tomb of Ozymandius.
Chulda took pity on me and I didn't get sick this time. I even took a turn at watch duty up in the crow's nest (wonder why they call it that, I didn't see any crows up there, I haven't even seen any since we left land, can crows swim?). The trip was very uneventful until the end. Kheriim was looking over the edge (maybe she was making an offering to Chulda too) and a white pudding tried to eat her face! We chopped it up but that just made things worse because now there were two of them.. then four.... Prince Leif killed it though, with a blast of magic. Then HE started to yell at me for not having attack spells! Leif spends too much time with Soern if you ask me.
Don't worry mum. I'll be fine.

Your loving son,
Aed Godfinder

Diplomatic Log 2

Contact was made with the representative from Chak Itzin, one Ket Takchitan. Discussion was limited due to representative being more concerned with potential retribution from Thunder God, than with real diplomacy. If assistance were offered to the priests of the island, the opportunity might present to gather further, detailed information. Alternatively, the representative could be presented to Thunder God in hopes of gaining favor with that faction.
Having witnessed a discussion between the Commandant, Lady Sigrid, and the Diamond Throne representatives, reanalysis of early estimations is required. No knowledge of basic terms i.e. "tariff" was shown by Commandant. Sinking of vessels was implied in his understanding of said term. Suggestion of power struggle may simply have been combination of drunkenness and gross ignorance on part of the Commandant. Further investigation is required for definitive conclusions to be reached.
The Lord of the Empire has remained absent for the majority of the summit. If rumours of his failing health prove founded, our timeline may have to be moved up. The death of the man currently attuned to the Heart would of course leave no choice but to move immediately.

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Session 2: In Which Janan Explains Things

Leif researches in Xanadu Library with little luck
We sail for Ao-Manasa
Halden convinces Kheriim that Leif is a terrible person.
Janan convinces Halden that Janan is awesome.
Janan also convinces Kheriim of many spur-of-the-moment tall tales.
We arrive at Ao-Manasa

[unsure of order of events, but decided this made most logical sense, even if it might not be how it happened]

We talk to Taevin whats-his-name, who gives us more info about a different artifact, a staff. It has the power to control bees. (and does other stuff, but really, BEES. obviously more important. and awesome.)

Janan convinces Kheriim to go to a bar with the rest of them. (Leif is there to stop bad stuff from happening?)
Halden tries to start a fight with the whole bar.
Janan tries to seduce Halden while fighting him.
Halden passes out, really really drunk.
Janan and Aed start fighting about...something...semantics, mainly, on the return to the boat.
Kheriim ends up casting a spell, as does Leif, in order to convince them to return faster.
(Also at some point Janan inadverdantly implies that Sigrid sleeps around and Leif attacks him to defend his mother's honor. Janan is very confused by having somehow given insult and is Not Pleased with being attacked--ends up with a knife to Leif's throat and Aed's magical intervention.)
First plan is to find an island full of bees. Second, more logical plan is to make sail for the tomb of Ozymandius.
On the way, we are attacked by a White Pudding. (much more vicious than it sounds) We eventually prevail, but not without Janan ending up hanging upside down from the crow's nest and Kheriim sulking a hundred feet up. Good times. :D

Ridalou-god of finding island full of bees (spelling?)

scrap of paper found by Leif in Wines of the South:
…(torn)…simply destroyed the Staff, and indeed, it has not been seen in a long …(smudged)…doubt that an item of such power could be destroyed by such a man, at least without any fanfare or record. This is particularly so when considering the nature of the Staff’s reputed powers…(smudged)…on several occasions that the object would bring doom upon any would-be destroyer. In any event, it is also known that the priest, Tai Lakquar, disappeared unexpectedly during the early…(smudged)…that he was a victim of Meren’s political ambitions, close as he had been to the new emperor’s father, but perhaps…(torn)…

info on scrap of paper as determined by Aed with object loresight:
  • 2000 years old
  • Last touched by: Leif
  • Race of last to touch: human
  • Creator: Tai Qualir
  • Race of creator: human
  • Purpose: to preserve knowledge
  • Made of: paper/ink
  • Location: Xanadu Library

info from Taevin about staff:
  • forged for the first emperor of the hora quan
  • Before the Aur Xica, son of first emperor created that
  • Had a number of powers: storm controlling, attuned to positive energy, controlled bees
  • Everyone assumes son had staff destroyed or hidden, because son went bad

"...Pantsless engineering?" -Oddysey, re: some note in her dm prep [context? what context?]

"...I think we're going to consume alcohol." -Artemis, Kheriim
"Sweet."-Oddysey, Halden

"What is" -Artemis, Kherriim
"Watch! It's totally awesome. You see the person on watch gets to go up in the crow's next--the round thingamajig up there--and watches." -maggienotmegan, Janan
"For what?"-Artemis, Kherriim
"Whales."-maggienotmegan, Janan
"...big fish?"-Artemis, Kherriim
"Yeah! Sort of."-maggienotmegan, Janan
"Why?"-Artemis, Kherriim
"Because whales are magical. You have to watch real close, and don't blink, and if you see one, you yell out the magic phrase and they'll grant you a wish!" -maggienotmegan, Janan
"...what's the magic phrase?" -Artemis, Kherriim
(whispers)"Supercalifragiliousexpialidocious" -maggienotmegan, Janan
"Watch sounds like fun."-Artemis, Kherriim
"Well, tell you what, seeing as you've never done this before, I've got first watch, but I'll let you take it instead."-maggienotmegan, Janan

"The more the merrier! Well, really that's for orgies, but never mind that!"-maggienotmegan, Janan

Halden! am I right or am I right?"-maggienotmegan, Janan
"You're completely right! Getting drunk is exactly like reading!"-Oddysey, Halden

"You want to fight? Alright then! What're the stakes? Tell you what, I win, you have to kiss me, I lose, I have to kiss you."-maggienotmegan, Janan, to Halden re: his drunk fighting challenge

"Why is he running around screaming?"-Artemis, Kherriim
"Don't worry about it. Longstanding tradition of bartenders."-maggienotmegan, Janan
"He looks angry. And he's yelling at you."-Artemis, Kherriim
"Naw, don't worry about it! He's just expressing his appreciation of our complete enjoiment of the bar."-maggienotmegan, Janan
"And he's mouthing I'm going to kill you."-Artemis, Kherriim
"Sign of affection."-maggienotmegan, Janan

"Look, you break it, you buy it, right? So when you break something, it's like you bought it! so it's like you're giving them gold--except that you arent and it's broken, but not the point. Breaking things is perfectly fine." -maggienotmegan, Janan, to Kherriim, re: burning the bar down

"He started the undead thing."-Oddysey, Taevin
"Did he start democracy too? Because I heard democracy and undead, you know, are like that."-maggienotmegan, Janan
"...Democracy is not something I associate with the undead."-Oddysey, Taevin
"One corpse, one vote!"-Foole, Aed

"I'm very, very offended! I'm hurt!-maggienotmegan, Janan
"No,no! I'm going to kill you!"-Artemis, Kherriim
"...that's the sweetest thing anyone ever told me!"-maggienotmegan, Janan

"That. is a. bee sound. I know a bee sound when I hear one. I know a bee from a bonnet, a hawk from a handsaw, and the wind doesn't have to be north-north-west either"-maggienotmegan, Janan, to Halden, under the influence of ale & a ghostly sound spell

"whales whales whales whales that's not a whale whales whales whales"--Artemis, Kherriim, sung while watching for whales

"Do whales make thumps and slithery sounds?"-Artemis, Kherriim

"Way to sink the ship!"-maggienotmegan, Janan, re: magic water attack
"It's water. Water doesn't sink ships." -saganatsu, Leif
"Yes, it does! Water sinks ships all the time!"-maggienotmegan, Janan

Friday, June 5, 2009

Don Marko and Gorzams Gang War

Don Marko:

Sons of The Family are often left to their own devices, and are never given anything for free, unless they somehow “convince” people to give them things. Eventually, one of a generation is ruthless enough, clever enough, or well-liked enough that they are chosen to be the next Don (by the current Don). Don Marko’s first name also happens to be Don, and he won his status through more benevolence than ruthlessness. That is not to say he is any sort of pushover or pacifist. He is a fair person… for a pirate from Gorzam.

Don Marko is a few years younger than Blank, and has only been Don for about 15 years. Before that, he was in the traditional second-in-command position, running the Black Market on Gorzam’s main street. In the year 7, Iliam assassinated the old Don, and tried to claim that title as his own. But most of the inhabitants (and all of the Family patriarchs) recognized Don Marko instead. With the help of Blank, Don Marko hunted down and defeated Iliam. Shortly after, the Hora Quan officially annexed Gorzam.


Gang War:

Year 16: Two Brothers, Maurice and Gabriel Antolini, have a falling out at age 18. They become bitter rivals, and opposing gangs form around them. As time goes on, Maurice becomes more violent and ruthless, more than the Family usually is. There is a bar run by Maurice’s gang that is rumored to have rum, despite the shortage. It’s very expensive though, and has tight security. Gabriel stays true to the old ways, though he is less lenient when dealing with his brother’s gang.

Year 20: Patriarch Pazzesco disappears one moonless night. He is found months later, wearing animal skins and wielding a staff while chanting to a fire, in the footsteps of the mountainous region to the northeast. He is convinced to come back to Gorzam, but he begins recruiting people into his cult. Little is known about the cult, other than they occasionally lure Yetis down from the mountains to cause havoc, and that they have cabals out in the mountains footsteps.

Year 22: Gabriel becomes less patient, Maurice becomes more aggressive, and Pazzesco is becoming a greater problem, though he is seen less and less in Gorzam. Don Marko is trying to keep the peace and remain neutral, but he fears that a cleansing bloodbath is inevitable.


The city is on the southern end of the island.  There is a main street that goes from the main port (1) to the black market city section (2), then angles to the east. The black market city section is where Don Marko’s headquarters are, and the family has a tight hold on that section. South of that section on the west side of the main street (3) is controlled by Maurices gang. The entire city on the east side of the main street (4) is where Gabriel has the most influence. The north section (5) is controlled by Pazzesco and his cult. That is to say, Pazzesco has little presence elsewhere, and it is the area with the most Yeti problems.

Outside of the city, to the west, is the rural area (6), where people lead a very similar life to those in the city, only they live on and operate farms, and are less affected by the politics of town, and more dominated by personal control of ones own farm. On the west coast of the island, is the Pirate Cove (7), currently under tight security by an unknown pirate. North of those areas is the Frozen Wastes (8), which are designated by no other geographical marker than it’s where things stop growing, so the rural folk have no reason to venture in there. North east, are the mountains (9), where vicious creatures such as Yetis, and some reclusive humanoids live in caves.